4 months, 1 cateract, Jacob and a long drive.

I was reminded once again that I don't want to drive home after 2pm from Sherman Oaks. The 1.5 hour trip took nearly 3 hours.
I first stopped off at my eye doctor, Dr. Baskin and told me my Iritus was finally gone but why am I still seeing spots? Apparently I have a traumma induced cateract. Dr. Baskin said he has seen this kind of thing happen to people who have had trauma. He wants to watch my eye for a few months and sometime later I suppose I will get the short quick surgery.
I then continued on to GBC and met up with Dr. Peter. I still have some open spots on my head and they were acting infected. When they rotated my scalp there was a pinky nail sized spot where they could not close the scalp together. this area healed over then turned grey and then became an open wound again. Dr. Peter said the open spot goes right down to my skull. I will go back on the 27th and if it is not closing up He will do a little precedure in the office and stich it together.
Sunday 7-19-09 marks 4 months since my accident. its been an incredible road of support, mercy and Healing. I am still thankful, still feel fortunate, still feel blessed, and still am so glad for your support and love for this old guy and his family.
I have just heard about a 17 year old boy who was shocked by high voltage. Jacob was shocked while at the beach of all places. if you have time could you please pray for him? He is just getting out of being in an induced comma and is in a lot of pain.
Here is has blog. Jacob's Journey: Small steps
He gives and takes away, my heart will choose to say, Blessed be the name of the Lord, Job 1
See ya.
T

3-19-09 - 6-19-09

It has been an interesting 3 months. I still look in the mirror and wonder if it's all real or not. Twenty one days in the hospital. Another 3 weeks of sporting a head VAC and six surgeries. Can it all be real and true? Apparently it is.
I made the familiar trek to the Grossman Burn Center for a checkup. Nice to see Dr. Peter , Kurt, Corrina and Lilly. The place was abuzz with patients but Dr. Peter still took the time to hang out a bit and talk. As Dr. Peter examined my head we talked about future reconstruction of my scalp. First I need to wait a good six months before I do anything. The idea would be to expand the scalp I have by basically stretching it with these surgically installed "Tissue Expanders". The stretched out scalp skin would then be spread out over my bald spots and ..Walla!, the bald is gone. The result would be a fully restored head of hair. This does come with a price though. 4 surgeries over several months and the tissue expansion makes one look like....well...like a guy with a huge tumor on his head. These baseball sized expansions would get bigger and bigger by way of injecting fluid into the Tissue Expansion device. The big question is: Do I really need to do this? Heather has informed me that she will not leave me if I remain like I am...hah but on the other hand she thinks that the restored scalp would serve as a great protection against skin cancer, cuts and bruises. Part of me think it vain to do this stuff and the other part thinks its a practical matter. Do I want to wear hats and sunscreen on my head for the rest of my life? Not that big of deal, I am getting used to the hat thing. Its funny, when I talk to my balding or bald cohorts, I don't get a lot of sympathy. They look at me like "What's the big deal" Hair loss loves company I guess? I have great empathy for those who have life altering body changes such as the badly burned. People like to look and stair and wonder. My deal is nothing like that but I have to say I am self conscious of my head and how I "look". It's been a good exercises in what is important and the whole vanity thing. Are you OK with a chunk of scalp missing from your head? I am beginning to think the answer for me is..YES. Our society puts great emphasis on looks and beauty and I am part of that thinking. I like when someone thinks I am handsome as I suppose you do to. The far greater compliment though, is when someone thinks you are beautiful inside. We settle for the exterior stuff way to fast. Maybe because for some it is easy to be good looking because you were born that way. Not much to work at. Other's spend a great deal of time to get looking good, we all have our blessings right? I wonder if we spend more time thinking about our outer beauty instead of our inner beauty? How do others see you as a person on the inside? Ask them some time, you might be surprised.
I don't mean to put some kind of guilty trip on us but I do think it worthy to at least think about. I was really not sure of what to write on this 3 month anniversary. Funny what comes to mind.

Needless to say, Dr. Peter liked the healing on my head and I will now wait 3 months till my next office visit. 3 months? Wow, I am going to miss the GBC gang. It was great to see a few of the nurses and medical staff. I couldn't help to look a little in each room as I walked by. New people in the beds, new injuries, new issues. You know how we say the term "circle of lfe" well I thought of that term in an injury sense, "circle of injury". We keep hurting ourselves. sometimes by our own dumb fault ( me) and sometimes by someone else. The injuries just keep coming. I must say it felt really great and really not great being there. I loved seeing my nursing friends but as I walk in a hospital now, I have this "all to familiar" feeling. Can't move too much, being wrapped up like a mummy, needles, pain, surgery, burns, dressing changes and the like. Kind of surreal I guess. I hope I am not conveying complaint here, its just a feeling I got whilst there. One good bit of news I did while there was that the lady who was burned so bad code named "Hope" is at home now. She has daily contact with GBC but a least she's home. Continue to pray for her and all of the 34 occupied beds at the GBC.

As you can imagine I hear many stories of how others have been shocked or electrocuted. The newest story was told to me about a woman who was told to shake the sparking temporary power pole at a construction site. The strung up wires were buzzing and sparking and the best advice was to shake the pole to get the sparking to go away. This shaking brought the lines down on her head. She was shocked with 220 volts and spent 2 full months in the hospital and still has brain function problems. When I heard how bad this woman was hurt with 220 volts I was humbled to be alive after a 13,200 volt experience. I have been hearing so often that "you are lucky to be alive" and so on and yes that is what I kind of want to hear but it is said so often its lost its impact. When I heard this story about this lady it renewed that idea in a special way. Luck? That word seems so random and shallow. If we do not believe that God is involved with ALL of what happens to us, we need to open up our bibles and get our theology right. Why was I so graciously spared? Why are others not spared? Not sure myself or anyone can answer such questions. All I can do is be grateful for being spared, be grateful for life, grateful that I know this incredible God, grateful for friends and family and know that God has more plans for me
(and you) as long as we are breathing on this earth!

Happy Fathers Day to all you dads out there.
See Ya------------Electro Todd

Reminder

Hello there sports fans. how ya doing today? I hope well.
You gotta love these self portraits! ha.

On my last post I ended with a sentence that asked if you would remind me of something. You might think I am a little wacked for saying this....Ok so I am a little off! ha.
I want you to remind me over the years of this experience. Remind me that I almost died. Should have died. Remind me how big God's love is in all of you. Let me know when I complain and remind me how I did not want to do that anymore. Remind me of what is important, God family and friends. Remind me that I wanted to serve God in whatever capacity He wishes. Remind me of the thousands of prayers, dozens of cards, and many gifts that were sent. Remind me about the huge number of people who prayed for me that I didn't even know. Remind me how Jim Peterson grabbed me and kept me on that roof. Remind me how awesome the Potter's Clay staff handled the situation and was so well prepared. Remind me of the incredible care I received from doctors and nurses. Remind me how great Heather handled the situation and cared for me so well. And according to Gracie, remind me to be mature.... ha.

here is a quote that really sums up how I feel. ( Thank You Rosemary for the quote)

The pressure of difficult times makes us value life. Every time our life is spared and given back to us after a trial, it is like a new beginning. We better understand its value and thereby apply ourselves more effectively for God and for humankind. And the pressure we endure helps us to understand the trials of others, equipping us to help them and sympathize with them....

todd

hi everyone! i just wanted to say a word of thanks coming from a daughter who loves her dad very much (though he can be immature at times (; ) and is very thankful that he is still here with us today. thank you to all the friends, family, schoolmates, teachers, and everyone else who have been so caring, thoughtful, and loving to me, as well as the rest of the family. i appreciate and love you all so much! Happy Summer!!!
-Gracie

Released!

Released from what? Well, at my last doctors visit Dr.Peter and dr Kirt said it was time to play! I have been given full clearance to start any and all activities. After a week of chin wrap and soft spot, this is awesome news! I will have to admit I was getting a little rebellious with my chin wrapping toward the end of the 7 day sentence. After some 50-60 days out of 70 with Vacs and gauze and Mepolex and the like, I was getting a bit ancy to be free. It was music to my ears to have them say that the wrapping is over.
Concerns? Not too many.
1.There is a chance that I might get some in grown hairs on my head from how my scalp is growing in on each other.
2.My eye still has Iritus and after some rebellion in the eye drop department, my eye started to hurt some today. Note to self. Take eye drops.
3. Fingertips still numb and tingly.
4. My feet are a bit numb and tingly especially when I take off my shoes.
5. My legs are working a little better but very uncoordinated by pre injury standards. I had an informal talk with a neurologist and he said. " Basically you are going through a major "reboot" and you will be fine in 6 months".
6. My head is feeling pretty good but it has its tender spots.
Not saying these things as complaints but as information. Number 5 has got me concerned but I need to give it and all the items Time.
A friend asked me the other day how I was really doing with this whole thing? Am I really this "up"about the whole thing? Have I put myself in a corner with portraying this resilient attitude?
Answer- I remember coming out of surgery 4 with a VAC back on my head. That was some hard news to hear and it took a couple days to get it together. I was pretty down as I shared in a previous post. It was kind of funny that after Dr. Miua saw me he upped some medication I am taking and shortly after that I got a visit from the staff Phsycologist (Jonathan). Jonathan is a cool guy and talking to him is fun but I learned that one must be careful what they say in a hospital!! ha. I admit I was getting agitated with the whole head wrap deal, partly because some of it did not make sense to me. There were some days when I felt beat up particularly when I was basically blind with Iritus and after getting my sight back( thank you Dr. Baskin) I went to a doc appointment for my head and they poked and picked and packed and I had not taken any pain meds. Yes that was a hard day but really I feel thankful and blessed and ready to go on. I must give credit to God for getting me through this without great mental anguish. HE is Stronger than any situation. To tell you the truth I am way more affected by the fog than this injury. I have SAD, Seasonal Affected Disorder. The fog monster comes into Santa Barbara seemingly often and it really gets to me. I try to fight through it but after a few days I sometimes get down. Again, not complaining but sharing. Enough of this.
I was able to get on my bike in a real way yesterday. I rode 6 miles. It felt good and I went along at a pretty god clip. When my muscles are under tension they work better. Cycling has been something I have been doing most of my life so it is a good fit.
Sorry this update did not come sooner. My computer is on the blink and I didn't realize how easy it was to post from another computer.
Well I need to go. Chores to do, push ups to conquer and I was even thinking of trying some hits on my speed bag, ( boxing bag hangs from a platform....good for coordination).
Thanks for listening, praying and being the best support a fellow could ever have.
I will be posting about once a week until there is no more to say in case you want to know.
Stay tuned for next weeks post..I need you to remind me of something.
Todd

Victim or Survivor?

These two words are very interesting and powerful. We ( general public) use the word "victim" very liberally when talking about our situations. The dictionary says the definition of the word victim is:
1. a person who suffers from a destructive or injurious action or agency: a victim of an automobile accident.
The definition pretty much backs up what we call "victims" except that we ( general public) tend to take it a little too far. We are victims of coffee spills, long lines, bee stings and the like. It would be VERY easy to go into the Grossman Burn Center and start saying "victim this" and "victim that" but that word is no where to be found. It was quite refreshing to here the staff talk about their patients as "survivors". The GBC monthly news letter is called "Survivor Newsletter". I like that. Though the burn patients are victims according to Webster, it's an unhealthy way to look at things. Calling someone or referring to yourself as a survivor is a positive way of describing a tough situation. Instead of wallowing in self pity, anger and the like, being survivor makes me think of being thankful that I am alive. It makes me want to get better. It makes me feel stronger. Being a victim feels like wearing a heavy coat on a hot day. (or worse). We will never exactly know why things happen the way they do but we do know what Romans 8:28 says: And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him. I'm not saying we will not be without pain in these hard or bad things that happen to us but that somehow God has a bigger plan. A plan we do not understand. A plan that could look cruel or mean in our eyes but we have not the eyes of God. If I don't believe this I am afraid I would fall into the victim category. If I do that it will lead to an angry downward spiral that goes no where.
So,..... all that to say. I am a survivor! A person who continues to function or prosper in spite of opposition, hardship, or setbacks. (Webster)
I have survived 2 of my 7 days of chin wrap. How nice it is to take it off for showers.
I hope you have a great day, a thankful day, a survivor day!
Cheers------Todd

What kind of an anniversary present is this?

Today May 19th marks my 2 month anniversary of my injury date. Wow time flies by when your healing!
Ok, so what the heck in on my head. Little tiny bump in the road. Heather noticed that a 2.5 inch area of my flap was kind of mushy and full of fluid. I called GBC and they said to come down. dr. Kirt cut it open a little and tried to drain the area but not much came out. Good. He then proceeded to put my old friend, "chin wrap" back on for a week. I get to take it off before showers and then wrap it back up. Showers take a long time, don't they? say, 3-4 hours? hah. I need to keep pressure on that area and also absorb any fluid that comes up and that is what all the fuss is about. As I drove away I remembered it was my anniversary.
Kirt said not to worry, my head looks 97% good and refers to this little blip not even a 1/4 step backward. The wound looks great. I go back in a week and we will take the next step then. It was a great week or so of no wrap. This next week will make me even more thankful for an unobstructed head.
I knew they would do something to my head that would not be fun and I felt sorry for myself for about 10 minutes when thinking about it yesterday. I quickly snapped out of it and said to myself, "Bring it on". I will persevere. The alternative is just a whiny existence that no one wants to be around.
I leave you now gritting my teeth ( in a good way). I have been though 60 days of challenge, 7 more, no problem!!!
Over and out-------------------T
PS ---no "sorry you're all wrapped up again" comments. It comes with the territory. Be tough.